Forecast

So where do I sit. My guess is I will be leaving Mt. Sinai not this coming week, but early the following week, maybe the 17th or 18th. The doctors and therapists are happy with the progress but there is still much work to be done. As for the fractures they are healing themselves, but slowly, and still get painfully aggravated. The nerve damage on the foot, arm and leg is staying the same. A little frustrating, but nerve damage can take many months if not years to heal itself. It is something I have to realize and not get frustrated over even though that is the first thing I want to do. I am still working on strengthening, range of motion, the walk, dexterity, and they all improve daily, but in small steps, and there are lots of steps ahead of me.

So what happens when I get home? Honestly, I don't know. I mean, a pattern will emerge, I will probably go to therapy at a Brooklyn location 3 times a week. Progress from home and try to settle into what is a normal life, but it will be difficult. In all honesty, I am scared to death. At Mt. Sinai I have had, doctors, nurses and therapists steps away from me if something happens. At home I lose that security. Don't get me wrong, I will have friends and family close, especially for the first few weeks, but there are going to be those moments. One refrain you hear at Mt. Sinai regarding release is when something goes wrong at home, and they assume it will, 'don't panic, whatever you do don't panic'. Not the cheeriest words of advice

The thing is, if in normal life you are running at 100% I am probably at 15% right now and that might be generous. I can walk maybe a few 100 feet, have to bathe in a chair, even getting up from seat can be a struggle. I can feed myself, can make a bowl of cereal, slip on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, but these are the most basic things, and I am winded after doing just a few. I guess the realization of just how long and hard the rehab process is going to take is setting in and it is frightening.

I want to get back to the point that cooking dinner for friends is not an impossibility, going over to a friend's house does not seem like trekking the Himalayas, and living a regular daily life does not seem like a dream in the future. But I know it will take time, I know I have the unwavering support of a team that will not disappear, and I know I have an amazing amount of work to do. Am I scared, hell yes, but that is trumped by the fact that when I get home I will be closer to the people I care about the most.